The other day, after procrastinating for four straight days, I finally went down to the neighbor’s house below Chad and Leilani’s to ask if I might use their driveway to replace the EGR Valve in
Bubbles.
Yesterday, late in the afternoon, I made up my mind to replace the thing. Here is what I learned:
Materials needed:
manual
wrenches
socket set
work gloves
down coat
brown suede high heels
One Chad
Two neighbors (male)
The step-by-step
Place tools near hood
Do as manual says and jack car up off ground
Open hood
Unfasten the negative connection of car battery
Look at EGR Valve, follow EGR Valve tube to where it attaches to exhaust-manifold-area-thing
Realize the manual is dead wrong
Lower car
To remove EGR Valve one must:
Unfasten mounting bolts on EGR Valve
Loosen Large Bolt that fastens EGR Valve to EGR Tube
To loosen Large Bolt that fastens EGR Valve to EGR Tube one must:
Detach EGR Tube from Exhaust manifold area thing
To Detach EGR Tube from Exhaust manifold area thing one must:
Detach Mounting Bracket of EGR Tube
Attempt to place rather large wrench into several small spaces
Re-attempt
Watch as six sided bolts become rounder, softer bolts
When trying to loosen a bolt that is too tight, locate a pipe to slide over wrench handle- it will provide more leverage
Attempt to loosen each bolt several times
Avoid hitting yourself in the head with the pipe
(or don't avoid hitting yourself in the head with the pipe)
Curse
Stand and look at car
Males, when they detect a woman in high heels holding a wrench over a vehicle’s engine will accumulate
At this time, it is a good idea to do one of two things:
Snarl
or
Step away and regale males with anecdotes and summarize
Woman in the Dunes
Note:
If you give a man a wrench, you will never get it back
It doesn’t matter if you know what you are doing, it matters as who has the wrench
Conclusion:
If you ask for help, be prepared to let go of the project. Thank everyone involved. Order a large thank you pizza and not a medium one.